5th Sunday of Lent, Year C
(Sorry, this is just my notes; not the complete text of the homily)
Safe haven Sunday, 25 dioceses
Ideal weekend to put it on,
since obviously the gospel has to do with sins of the flesh...
And competing modes of how to respond to the struggle
Ideal place for reflection: what do we do?
2 answers even in Jesus’s own final statement:
Neither do I condemn
Go and sin no more
He lifts the shame
Sets on a path to solid freedom and recovery
We do hear in a thing like Safe Haven Sunday, A call to protect,
Lay down defenses,
Not pull punches in calling out what is dangerous,
Not be wishy washy
Not be naive
Little booklet is great on that.
But we also recognize that shame is not our friend in this work,
And shame will quickly undermine what we Christians actually want
For our brothers and sisters,
Sons and daughters
Ch. 6, the fourth wall
Safety and trust within the home...
Openness and healing,
not shame and hiding
8yo sees a pop up or a weird scene on tv
Safety to say it
11yo curious and tempted
Vulnerable—through trust and love—to admit
14yo to admit and say I need help. I’m caught in this
We might be tempted to assume it’s just a certain age range or a single gender.
So we, as families and as a community, need to be putting out the constant message:
Do not be afraid
Do not be ashamed
Quoting Jesus: “Then neither to I condemn you”
This isn’t your fault;
this didn’t start with you;
you were targeted from an early age by marketers and media makers
You are not alone.
We will get you help.
We won’t abandon you in this.
We love you;
we don’t despise you.
We will do anything it takes to help you get free
But know that—because of our great love for you—we will fight hard against the thing that is tormenting you.
Who do we go to?
Talk to me.
Talk to Fr. Kilcawley.
He’s got tons of counselors to refer you to.
Most likely, we would visit with you and send you to some trained to really start recovery.
Even if you want to tell priests nothing and just get a referral: awesome.
And like I said, this doesn’t apply to just one gender,
and it isn’t a message that stops at 14 or 18 or 22.
We are now to the point where multiple generations have been surrounded and attacked,
and probably with more casualties than escapees.
And so to the adult here:
If this is a problem for you, or
For a spouse
For a friend
For an adult son or daughter
For a boyfriend or girlfriend
Again, the message of today’s gospel is the same:
We love you
We will help you
We cannot be a community of shame
We have to be a community of healing
Of vulnerability and transparency
“Vulnerability kills shame”
Help is available.
Kilcawley: Therapy, recovery group, eventually spiritual direction
About 40 years ago, 2 guys who were struggling, took the AA model, the Alcoholics Anonymous model, and applied it to these kind of behaviors
There is one of those meetings for men right here in Wahoo every week.
Not the kind of thing that is advertised openly
But if you come to one of us priests,
either in the confessional or in person,
we can tell you when
and where it meets.
Not one in Wahoo that I know
I think Omaha too
Could have one here. All you need is 2-3 people who will be honest and vulnerable and can meet regularly.
SAnon: for, not the addict, but those affected by it—spouse, kids, etc.
Books and Cards
Beside the gospel today, it’s great this happens in Lent
We know that Jesus came to take on—not only our sin—but our shame as well
He came that his wounds might heal our wounds
So we can, in our turn, break down those barriers of shame
To say—even though it’s awkward—we can talk about this...
We need to talk about this.
Open up that path of communication
So that what is broken may be healed
And what is hidden in darkness may come to light